Coping with a High-Conflict Ex During Divorce | Greebel & Greebel
Strategies for Peace of Mind
Going through a divorce or custody battle is hard enough—but when your ex seems to thrive on conflict, it can feel downright exhausting. Whether it’s constant arguing, manipulative behavior, or co-parenting chaos, dealing with a high-conflict ex takes a toll on your emotional well-being.
At Greebel & Greebel, we’ve seen it all—and we’re here not just as legal advocates, but as trusted guides through one of life’s most difficult transitions. If you're navigating a divorce or post-divorce life with a high-conflict ex in Nassau or Suffolk County, this article is for you.
What Makes Someone a "High-Conflict" Ex?
A high-conflict ex is someone who:
- Struggles to compromise
- Blames others for everything
- Uses threats, manipulation, or guilt
- Tries to control the narrative with kids, friends, or even in court
They often turn simple matters—like a pickup time or vacation schedule—into major arguments. This behavior isn’t just frustrating; it can damage your peace of mind and your children’s emotional well-being.
1. Set Boundaries—And Stick to Them
Clear, firm boundaries are essential. That means:
- Communicating only about essential matters (like the kids)
- Using email or parenting apps to keep a written record
- Resisting the urge to respond emotionally
Tip: Keep replies brief, factual, and polite. Don’t engage in emotional baiting—it only fuels the conflict.
2. Document Everything
Keep a log of:
- Communications
- Missed visitations
- Hostile texts or emails
Why? Because documentation is protection—especially if your ex’s behavior spills into custody disputes. Our attorneys can use your documentation to support modifications or legal enforcement, if necessary.
3. Don’t Take the Bait
A high-conflict person thrives on reaction. If they can make you angry, defensive, or upset, they’ve succeeded.
Instead:
- Take a breath before responding
- Ask yourself: “Is this worth my energy?”
- Focus on facts, not feelings
4. Put the Kids First—Always
Never badmouth your ex in front of the children. It might feel justified, but it can:
- Increase their anxiety
- Damage your custody case
- Undermine your role as the steady parent
Let your actions speak. Stay calm, consistent, and reliable—kids notice more than you think.
5. Know When to Get Legal Help
Sometimes, the best way to deal with a high-conflict ex is through the court system. If they’re violating custody agreements, making false allegations, or refusing to cooperate, you need a legal team who can act swiftly and effectively.
That’s where Greebel & Greebel comes in. We handle:
- Custody and parenting time enforcement
- Order modifications
- Emergency filings when necessary
We’re not just lawyers—we’re your advocates. When you’re up against someone who won’t play fair, we will.
📍 Serving clients across Long Island, including Nassau and Suffolk Counties.
